Never in a million years....

...did I think that I would have to do what I did today.

We've really been struggling with Sam's behavior at home. He is a gem when he's at school, church, pretty much anywhere. The problem I'm afraid is with me. When Sam is asked to do something he doesn't want to do or if he's reprimanded for something, his anger begins, escalates and at times, he gets violent. With me.

I've had episodes where he'll kick, hit, spit, scream, etc. It can get really ugly and as he's getting older and bigger, it's only going to get worse. He is nearly bigger than me and he is strong. Very strong. I know he doesn't mean to be mean but he sometimes can't get himself under control. We see a psychiatrist and a psychologist, he's been on meds, we discuss ways to help him when he's feeling angry but sometimes these just don't work and he usually takes it out on me.

I've been thinking for a long time about taking Sam to the police station to show him where they bring people who are being mean but I just hadn't gotten around to it....

til now.

I made an appointment with Chief Womack at the Douglasville Police Department.

Chief Womack (center)
photo courtesy of City of Douglasville

Sam quickly made friends with the receptionist and the female officer who were in the lobby. They chatted with them about the Price is Right.
They gave him some little gifts.

We then went back to talk to the chief and he also brought in another officer who handles internet stuff. We all sat down and he asked why I was there. At that point I start crying and say, "I never thought I would have to do this." He quickly got me some tissue.

I explained my situation and they had a good chat with Sam trying to explain that they are there to help people but they can't have him hitting or being mean. Chief Womack asked Sam if he was a "good guy" or a "bad guy" and he of course said a "good guy". They had some good things to say to him that will hopefully help. They don't want him to be afraid of a police officer. I felt really good about what they told him

What I need from them is a system where if I have to call the police to intervene when Sam gets violent, I need a note in their system that lets the officer know that Sam is not a troubled kid but that he has special needs. He doesn't need to be take to jail or arrested but he may need to be taken out of the home for a bit for him to cool down or perhaps even the hospital. My guess is that I am not the only parent who will or has needed this type of help but I'd rather have things in place before it actually happens. I need a safety net.

I hope to establish a network between the special needs parents and the police department so that others who may be in a similar situation can also have this set up for them.

I wonder what could possibly be next on my "never in a millions years..." list.