Georgia Therapy Mom: Perks

One of the very few "perks" in my life.

I'm not afraid to use it either.

And yes, Sam is in the car with me when I do use it. I'm not a cheater.

Todd didn't like the fact that I had this little "perk". He felt that there are others who deserve it more. I beg to differ. There are people who deserve it less. Sorry. That was rude.

At this point, I take what I can get.

Funny things the kids say...

Sam: Do we have church on Sunday? Me: Yes, it's Stake Conference. Sam: I'm not going. I've got to do Face the Nation. Bob Schieffer needs me.
Sam got in the car to leave from school and I asked how his day was. He said he had a good day and that he did good in math. I asked him what he worked on and he said addition and subtraction then he said, "I whizzed at it!" Uh..ok.
We were at Sam's Club and they were doing some food demos. One was a white cake with strawberries. The man asked Sam if he wanted a sample and he said no thank you. As we were leaving Sam says, "If it's not chocolate, it's not for me. I'm a chocolate guy."
This morning Abby gave me a hug and buried her face in my chest. She said, "You don't smell good." then she turns to Todd, "Does she always smell like this." (I did just shower, I'm blaming the sweater)
Abby says, "What's for dinner?" I say, "Well, Sam had a bowl of cereal. What do you want." Abby says, "I just want to make a bowl of fry sauce and lick it out of a bowl." Um, no.
Abby says to me, "Mom, my blanket needs to be washed. It smells like Newman."
We had a big storm and the next day there was a Fox 5 News van doing a live shot at a neighbor's house. We decided to go check it out and Sam introduced himself to the reporter then said, "It's nice to meet you, I'm a big fan of Fox 5 News."
Sam was watching the Price is Right on the computer and he was standing in the living room so I asked him what he was doing and he said, "I'm rehersaling for the show."
Abby asked me where I bought some silly bands and I told her I got some at School Box. She then remembered that was where she saw the frogs that Santa had brought her for Christmas. "How does Santa know everything?" I said, "He's smart." Abby says, "He's the smartest. No offense Mom."
We were driving past Deerlick Park and Abby says to Theo & Lewis, "That's where Sam does Special Pops." After she explained what it was, Lewis asks, "Is that where they shoot balls at you out of a machine?" Abby's response, "No, they use real humans."
We were at the pet store in the mall and Abby was looking at all the puppies. She then said, "When Newman dies, which will be sad, can we get a new puppy?"
We were discussing a b-day party invitation and the girl happens to be a twin. Abby says, "They're not identical twins, they're virtual."
Sam hates to read for homework and his reason? "Reading hurts my groins."
We were sitting at the table having dinner and Todd says, "Abby, mom was bugging me this morning." Abby's reply, "That's her job."
Sam says, "Those Cheetos are my favorite." I reply, "I know, they are my favorite too!" To which he answers, "We have something in common."
I spent time putting Abby's doll house back together. The furniture was every where and it was a mess. I said to Abby, "I cleaned up your doll house today, it was a disaster." To which she replied, "Yeah, I think it was an earthquake."
I had made dinner one night and Sam's comment was, "That was divine."
Sam got in the car and then asked, "Did you have court today?" I said, "Yes, sir." "You don't have to go to jail?" "No, of course not." "I'm so happy for you!"
I had purchased a Christmas ornament for Abby and hid it so well that I couldn't find it. I finally found it and she said, "Good job mom." I said, "Well, there are worse things you could lose." And she replies, "Yeah, like your dignity." Very true.
Sam and I ran to Wal-mart and left due to how busy it was. He gets in the car and says, "That's an awful store."
We had just picked up Abby from the bus and she said, "Hurry, I've got to go to the bathroom." To which Sam replied, "Tie it in a knot!"
Abby says to Kristina after I left to meet a parent of a new child at Sam's school: "I'm glad I'm not going with them. I just don't know how to respond to Special Ed kids who aren't my brother."
We are at the mall eating lunch and Abby starts talking about the broccoli she had last night at Thai restaurant. "That broccoli was so sweet. Not sweet like cool but sweet like sweet."
Abby & her friend Hayden are in the back of the car watching Wall-E. They are trying to decide what planet is being shown. They start talking stars and Hayden asks, "what is above the stars?" Abby answers, "heaven, yeah I think it's heaven."
We were leaving the ballpark and Sam asked for some water. He picked up a water bottle out of the cooler and started walking. He comes up to me and says, "Mom, can you take this water, my hand is having a brain freeze."
We had grilled some steaks & I was using a big two-pronged serving fork. Sam says, "What's that? A pitchfork?"
Today was "cowboy" day at school for Abby so she didn't need to wear her uniform. I had a straw cowboy hat in my closet so I cut the tags off and she was wearing it this morning. I took it off to comb her hair and found a little sticker in her hair that said, "Made in China." I said, "Abby, you were made in China?" She said, "It should be a sticker that says, 'made in heaven." Ain't that the truth.
Todd and the kids were wrestling the other night...one of their favorite activites. After everyone had calmed down, Sam said, "I love it when dad strangles us!"
Sam is walking down the stairs after a bath and he says, "Mom, you're really good at being a stay-at-home mom."
I'm sitting at the computer and Sam comes up to me and I say, "What's all over your face?" And his response, "I don't know, snot?"
I had reheated some leftovers from a local restaurant and Sam kept eyeing it. I gave him a couple of bites. I kept eating and he said, "Why don't I just finish that for you." How generous!
Abby said, "Mom, I'm going to vote for Barak Obama." I said, "Why is that?" Abby says, "Because, I think it would be good for a brown person to be president. All we've had are white people."
We were having Family Home Evening and we were talking about King Mosiah. I had read to them that if we keep the commandments we will be happy and live with God someday. I then asked Sam, what will happen if we keep the commandments and he said, "I can be a gameshow host?"
Abby & I were talking about her upcoming birthday and she said, "I am so excited about my birthday, what do you think life will be like when I'm 6?" I paused a moment and said, "well, pretty much like it is now."
Abby stepped outside this morning and when she came in she said, “I can speak bird” then she started to whistle. “See?!”
G’ma Judy & G’pa David came to celebrate Sam’s b-day since they were going out of town. Their gift to Sam was a drum set. Todd set it all up in the living room and Judy had the drum sticks behind her back. She pulled the drumsticks out and he looked at them & in a very excited voice he said, “Chopsticks?!”
Sam & I were talking about medicine and I said, “That’s a side effect.” Then he started rattling off side effects of a medication he had heard from a commercial. I just looked at him and said, “Sam, you’re….(I paused)” and he said “ingenious”!
I was folding laundry and I asked Abby to put a small pile of towels on a chair. She took them and said, "I'm strong!" I said, "You are a big helper." She then said, "I'm a big, fat helper." to which I replied, "You are not fat." She then said, "Yes I am, I want to be fat, just like you."

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Perks

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